The ledger of debts

From my grandfather Verus: decent character, and control of my temper.

From my father's reputation and what I remember of him: modesty and a manly character.

From my mother: piety and generosity, and the avoidance not only of wrongdoing but even of wrong thoughts; and besides that, a simple way of living, far removed from the habits of the rich.

From my great-grandfather: not to have attended public schools, but to have had good teachers at home, and to recognize that this is something on which a person should spend without stinting.

From my tutor: not to become a partisan of the Green or the Blue at the Circus, nor of the Parmularius or the Scutarius in the gladiatorial contests; to endure hard work, to want little, to do things with my own hands, not to meddle in other people's business, and not to be quick to listen to slander.

From Diognetus: not to waste my energy on trifles. Not to give credence to what wonder-workers and charlatans say about spells, the driving out of daemons, and the like. Not to keep fighting quails or get carried away by such enthusiasms. To put up with plain speech. To grow close to philosophy. To listen first to Bacchius, then to Tandasis and Marcianus. To write dialogues as a young man. And to want a plank bed, an animal skin, and the other things that belong to that kind of Greek discipline.

From Rusticus: the sense that my character needed correcting and training. Not to be drawn into rhetorical rivalry, abstract writing, little moralizing speeches, or displays of discipline and kindness performed for show. To keep away from rhetoric, poetry, and fine writing. Not to walk around the house in formal dress or do other things of that sort. To write letters plainly, the way he wrote to my mother from Sinuessa. To be quick to soften and reconcile with people who have offended or wronged me in words, as soon as they show a willingness to make peace. To read carefully and not be content with a superficial grasp of a book. Not to agree too readily with people who talk a great deal. And I owe it to him that I came to know the discourses of Epictetus, which he gave me from his own copy.

From Apollonius: freedom of will and unwavering steadiness of purpose. To look to nothing else, not even for a moment, except reason. To remain the same through sharp pain, the loss of a child, and long illness. To see clearly, in a living example, that the same man can be both thoroughly resolute and easygoing, and not irritable when teaching. To have before me a man who plainly regarded his experience and skill in explaining philosophical principles as the least of his good qualities. And to learn from him how to accept what are considered favors from friends without being humbled by them or letting them pass unacknowledged.

From Sextus: a kindly disposition, the example of a household run in a fatherly way, the idea of living in accordance with nature; seriousness without pretense, careful attention to the interests of friends, tolerance of the ignorant and of those who form opinions without thinking things through. He had the gift of adapting himself readily to everyone, so that being with him was more pleasant than any flattery, and at the same time he was deeply respected by those around him. He also had the capacity to find and arrange, in an intelligent and orderly way, the principles necessary for living; he never showed anger or any other passion, being entirely free of passion while also being deeply affectionate; he could express approval without loud display, and he had great learning without showing it off.

From Alexander the grammarian: to avoid finding fault, and not to correct harshly anyone who used a barbarous, ungrammatical, or odd expression, but skillfully to slip in the very expression that should have been used, whether by way of answer, confirmation, joint inquiry into the matter itself rather than the wording, or some other suitable prompt.

From Fronto: to notice what envy, duplicity, and hypocrisy look like in a tyrant, and that generally those among us called Patricians are somewhat lacking in fatherly affection.

From Alexander the Platonist: not to say to anyone, or write in a letter, often or without real need, that I have no time; and not to keep excusing myself from the duties owed to those I live with by pleading urgent business.

From Catulus: not to shrug off a friend's complaint, even an unreasonable one, but to try to bring him back to his usual good feeling; to be ready to speak well of teachers, as is told of Domitius and Athenodotus; and to love my children truly.

From my brother Severus: to love my family, to love truth, and to love justice; and through him to come to know Thrasea, Helvidius, Cato, Dion, and Brutus. From him I got the idea of a state with one law for all, administered on the basis of equal rights and equal freedom of speech, and the idea of a kingship that above all respects the freedom of the governed. I also learned from him a consistent and unwavering regard for philosophy; a disposition to do good and give readily to others; a readiness to hope for the best and to trust that my friends love me. In him I observed no concealment of his views about those he disapproved of, so that his friends never had to guess what he wanted or didn't want—it was simply plain.

From Maximus: self-mastery, not to be pulled off course by anything; cheerfulness in all circumstances, including illness; a character that rightly blended gentleness with dignity; and to do what lay before me without complaint. I noticed that everyone believed he meant what he said, and that in everything he did there was never any bad intent. He never showed astonishment or alarm, was never in a hurry, never put things off, was never at a loss or downcast, never laughed to cover irritation, and was never, on the other hand, angry or suspicious. He was accustomed to doing good, ready to forgive, and free of all falsehood; he gave the impression of a man who could not be turned from what was right, rather than one who had merely been corrected onto it. No one, I think, could ever imagine that Maximus looked down on him, and no one would have dared to think himself better than Maximus. He also had the gift of being pleasantly humorous.